When I saw my mom recently after 8 months since my last visit, I would have never known that just 6 months ago she underwent a month-long stem cell transplant to battle multiple myeloma cancer. Aside from her short hair and super slim physique, she doesn’t look at all like someone that’s gone to hell and back in a year. In honor of her superhero strength at kicking this cancer thing in the face, here is what to expect if someone you love needs to go through this.
What To Expect Leading Up To A Stem Cell Transplant (Out Patient)
She’ll need to give daily injections to herself at home so she’ll be nervous and scared. Now’s the time to encourage her however you can. Pump her up. Call her, video her. Whatever it takes to let her know she’s got this.
Labs and appointments to prep for the inpatient procedure. This means a lot of driving or the need to stay overnight at a nearby hotel. There are ways you can help, like by offering to pay for a hotel room, gas card or even hold her hand if you’re nearby.
Stem cell collections will take place until the hospital collects the number of cells they need. This could take days. Fortunately for my mom, they got everything they needed on the first day. She was able to return home for a few days before the intense process started.
What To Expect During A Stem Cell Transplant (In-Patient)
Intense chemotherapy. The chemo process happens pretty quickly and talking with her is still on the table. Do it now while she’s still feeling ok.
Stem cells are re-infused after the second day of chemotherapy. This process went surprisingly fast for my mom. In fact, I was talking to her over WhatsApp just a few hours after the process. She was even eating with my Dad making the most of Valentine’s Day in the hospital.
Day 4 after the cells are re-infused is when things really change. Lethargy sits in and her body responds to the major process it just went through. Be there for the caregiver as best you can: answer calls, call him/her, and patiently wait.
Because there’s no immune system and it needs to rebuild itself, the opportunity for an infection is quite high. This is why no one is allowed to visit without a hazmat suit (not sure what it’s really called but picture a NASA-like suit of some kind).
Wait…Wait…Wait…
She might get really sick over the next week, especially if any sort of infection sets in.
She won’t be able to talk.
She’ll lose her hair even if they tell her she won’t.
It will be awful for her and hard on everyone waiting for the blood cell counts to start to rise again. The white blood cell count needs to be between 4 and 10 in order for it to be considered “back to normal”.
Day 10 is when things start to improve. If there is an infection, it might take longer.
Day 12 she’ll start eating solids like toast. She needs to be able to do things on her own, such as eat and shower, to be discharged on day 14 post the re-infusion.
Day 14 after the re-infusion is the earliest she can be discharged…if she can eat on her own, take a shower and do basic things like that, then she’ll be discharged to make room for the next patient. After a nutrition class and getting the port removed, she’s on her way home. Don’t expect to talk to her because she’s too tired, weak and in pain. For me, my dad would put WhatsApp on speaker so I could talk to her, but I never expected her to respond in return. That will take some time.
What To Expect During Recovery At Home
She’ll have lost weight. A lot of weight. The most important thing to help the caregiver with is putting together a meal plan per the nutrition guidelines and picking up groceries.
Her taste buds will have changed.
She won’t be able to talk. For a while.
The meds to take will be overwhelming and she might even avoid taking them. Be her biggest fan and cheer her on. Help the caregiver manage this part. Whether it’s calling a pharmacy, buying a “tray of hope” (my dad’s reference to the pill container), or just listening since you can’t do more than that from a distance.
She’ll be depressed, wondering if she did the right thing. And you can tell her, “Yes!”
She won’t be able to walk up or downstairs, and might even need help from the bed to the bathroom for a while. Be there for the caregiver as best you can.
She will get stronger.
She will start texting you back once in a while.
Eventually, she’ll start talking to you on the phone for a couple seconds.
By day 30 at home, if her blood counts are up, weight has improved and strength reasonably regained, her oncologist will give the green light to start living her life again. One bit at a time.
Top 10% And Now
My mom’s stem cell transplant was in February. She was quarantined at her home the month of March. She went outside in April. And by May was starting to do busy things again with my dad. Her doctor said she’s in the top 10%, which means she’s responded extremely well to the stem cell transplant compared to others “in her class”.
Since the day she left the hospital (6 months ago), she has increased her weight by 14 pounds and back to doing things that she enjoys, like making breakfast for my dad, mowing the lawn and even went to the beach with me in August.
Is she the same person after a stem cell transplant? No.
Is that to be expected? Yes.
She’s been through a lot and still in recovery, which can take 18+ months. The super chatty mom I’ve always known has become more reserved and quiet. I can certainly respect that and I’m ok with it because she’s pain-free, cancer-free and still with us. And it’s good to remember that she’s only 6 months into recovery.
Her priorities have changed. What used to seem important just isn’t that important anymore. Material things, keeping a clean house…all seem quite silly now. Family, togetherness, and heath are her top priorities. Not that they weren’t before, but it’s far more prominent now.
100% Worth It
Stem cell transplants are scary and the process of getting through one is downright awful. But 10% after only 6 months looks pretty darn good. There is no question she did the right thing. Pain-free and cancer-free. 100% worth it. In my opinion.
This post is dedicated to my mom for being my Wonder Woman (always been my favorite superhero) and to Manpreet, who is working through this with her own mom. Praying that all you cancer warriors stay cancer free! And for those taking it head on, you got this!
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