A British Lesson for America

I’ve been collecting a number of things about the UK that my home country could really learn a lesson from, with the intention of spotlighting a few big items.  I’m not quite ready to write about them all, but I can’t hold back on the school shooting one. 

When we first moved to the UK, within a month the Vegas mass shooting took place.  I cried nearly every day for 2 weeks, glued to the BBC, and the pictures of the deceased, reading about the families they left behind.  The country music massacre really affected me.  I couldn’t get through a day without choking back tears because all I could think of was that it could have been me, my hubs, or our country music friends.  It’s really forced me to consider not doing the things I love.  In some ways, it has.  My dad made me promise him that I wouldn’t go to a concert out of fear something would happen. 

And I don’t blame him. 

But now my heart is heavy again with grief and sadness over the Florida school shooting last week.  Although I’m 5000 miles away from home, a close English friend here was directly impacted by losing her friend in the shooting.  He was a teacher, one of 17 who died.

What is it going to take for America to make a change?  If the government can’t be moved by music concert or church service mass shootings (Sutherland Springs November 2017), then what about these poor innocent children attending school?  How many more school shootings is it going to take for leaders to align and do something different?  It shouldn’t be about being red or blue.  It’s simply about humanity, safety and doing the right thing for EVERYONE. 

I’m the last one to bring up politics because it makes me incredibly uncomfortable.  Frankly, I never ever do.  But this is just flat out common sense.  And I don’t mean to be a hypocrite.  I grew up with guns all around me.  I come from a very military family, with love for hunting and shooting as a sport.  I was taught to respect it.  Everyone in my family knows the difference and it’s what my dad has also taught my son. 

But times have changed.

Now children are growing up in an entirely different environment; one of fear in the USA to go to school.  Homeschooling has a totally different ring to it now.  The 1980s conversations my parents had with me when I was a kid seem so vintage.  Stranger danger with creepy men in vans offering candy and ice cream talks have been replaced with, “here is what you need to do if there is a shooter in your school”.  The conversation is unimaginable and like other bad things, I believe many of us carry on as though it’ll never happen again.  But then it does. Again and again.

My son has been terribly homesick.  He loves America.  He doesn’t think there is anything better.  His patriotism is unquestionable.  But as he was crying in the car on the way to school yesterday because he missed America so much, I reminded him of the unique opportunity he has to learn a new culture, new experiences and exposure to hobbies he didn’t have in the States.  It didn’t really seem to matter to him though.  I couldn’t cheer him up.  I wanted to say, “There are no guns here” but I couldn’t bring myself to say it because it seems so awkward for me to have to say that to my 8-year-old.

But then something happened. 

His classmate, the daughter of my friend above mentioned, asked the school if she could organize a run in memory of this Florida teacher to encourage others to do the same.  She went to her class and asked, “Who’s in?” And the entire 8-year-old class followed.

I didn’t even know my son knew about the shooting.  Like I said, the conversation is unimaginable and scary, so I’ve sheltered both kids from this type of news out of fear my sensitive littles will not understand and ask me questions I can’t answer. 

And that’s what he did.

“Why do people sell guns to these bad people? 

How does someone with a mental condition get a gun, Mom? 

How did a kid get a gun? 

Will Trump really ban those bad parts, Mom?

Why didn’t Obama do something when he was in office?”

My 5-year-old chimed in with, “If they have a condition, they shouldn’t have a gun.”  My 5-year-old!

The conversation carried on, but this morning my son had something to be really happy about as he got out of the car to attend his British school.  We live in the UK.  We don’t have to worry about that here.  My kids can go to school and I don’t have to fear for their lives.  They don’t have to fear for their lives.  People don’t have guns here.  Police officers don’t even carry them.  I feel safer here than I’ve ever felt living in the United States.  I didn’t realize how different it would be, but it really is.

But for my friends and family, I worry about the possibility of a school shooting. 

Three good friends, including my sister-in-law, are teachers.  I found a shared Facebook post that a doorstop is what could possibly save your life, if not buy you time.  It’s already been shared over 1.4 million times since February 16th.  It’s a morbid thought, but a tip from a security expert that was given to her after the Sandy Hook shooting.  Sadly, I’ll be buying two when we return to the USA school system. 

For now, I’m thankful to live in this gun free country.  It very well might be a reason to not move back.  We’ll see.  And if my generation can’t sort this out, then the memorial run this week demonstrates that it very well might be a compassionate British 8-year-old generation that does – at least that’s a lesson upon which we can all agree.